I guess I'm an elitist then...

As the wife and I have been discussing the plans to have a 4th child late next year, I came across this article on the Washington Post. It would appear that I am some sort of elitist for having more than 3 kids. The the author of the article, Pamela Paul covers the facts compared to the stigma pretty well.

First the financial stigma:

Last month, the Department of Agriculture estimated that each American child costs an average of $204,060 to house, clothe, educate and entertain until the age of 18.

Then some of the social stigma:

When Elana Sigall, a 43-year-old attorney in Brooklyn, was pregnant with her third, people came up to her constantly, she said, to admonish her: "You've got a boy and a girl already. Why don't you just leave it alone?"

New York, where I live -- having three or more children has now come to seem like an ostentatious display of good fortune, akin to owning a pied-Ã -terre in Paris.

(I have no idea what a pied-Ã -terre is, I googled it, found nothing)

She sums some of cause and effect of the above:

parents can count on spending at least $6,500 on the first year of baby gear alone.

In upscale urban areas and tony suburban enclaves, where luxury families are flourishing, that can translate to $800 a week for child care alone.

A small comment on absentee parenting:

For parents who both work full-time -- or those otherwise occupied with family, charitable and social obligations -- child care doesn't end when the children enter school. If you calculate nanny pay on top of $26,000 annual private school tuition (eventually multiplied by three), you're talking $140,000 just to keep your children safe and reasonably occupied while the sun's up.

Then hits the nail on the head:

Didn't Benjamin Franklin grow up to be a statesman, inventor, printer, author and political theorist without having his vision enhanced by a Stim-Mobile or his sense of spatial relations improved by Baby Einstein Numbers? Somehow young Ben managed to thrive and prosper even though the Teddy bear had yet to be invented.

Today's American children, by contrast, get an average of 70 new toys a year, yet child development experts agree that the best toys are simple playthings such as blocks, balls and figurines that a child can play with over and over, in new ways.

In my experience, with only myself working (a meager salary, no matter what you think a bottom of the totem pole software company employee makes). We seem to do OK. Our kids are fed, and they have a roof keeping them dry. They have toys (most of which were bought by aunts, uncles and grandparents). They don't watch 1000 hours of TV a week, so they don't have the consumerism "MOMMY I HAVE TO HAVE THE NEW SUPER POWER ZORD TOY!!" attitude. And at the end of the day, they appear to be happy not left wanting. I adore my children and enjoy almost every aspect of raising them (diapers suck, always, no getting around it). I look forward to having at least one more.

And if this makes me an elitist, then fine, if the wife can handle it, perhaps I'll have 10 more!

Who was it that said your wealth was not measured by coin but by your family and friends?

Nevermind, the wife looked it up for me, I had it all wrong. Here ya go:

"I don't care how poor a man is, if he has family, he's rich" - Col Potter (4077th M*A*S*H)


Read the entire article here